Getting Ready for the Marine's Ball - Protocol, How to Address People at Military Events

I consider myself pretty knowledgeable on etiquette (...that is because I have an specialty on it haha) and certainly the way military addresses themselves have a huge deal of protocol.

I will try to address some points here so you feel confortable while in a military event. While getting ready for the Ball, some questions came to my mind: Being a civilian in a military environment, how should I address them? Do the standard rules of protocol apply for them? Should I address them by their ranks?...do I have to know their ranks in the first place?

If you are the kind of person that thinks that everybody is the same, military or not,  then this article is not for you. Even though, as long as you use the basic protocol you will be good, this is for the ones that want to master the event.


If you ask my Marine boyfriend you would probably die with the answer :) He is very proud of what he does and has worked hard to get where he is, meaning yes, he wants to be recognized. First thing first, he expects me to learn the Marine's ranks. A complete list was submitted to me like a year ago, and I promised to be ready for the Ball, so, here I am. Not only I’m going to rock that list but I’m going to be the Queen of  protocol (I will also be tested by him on spot haha).


The first thing we need to know is: there is a difference between officers and enlisted. Addressing an enlisted as if they were officers won't make a good impression and it is even worst if you do the contrary, addressing an officer as an enlisted. Therefore, you need to know who is who.





To identify the rank (which will also tell you if they are officers or enlisted) you will need to look in different places depending on the uniform they are using and if they are in fact enlisted or officers, to locate the rank insignia.

Enlisted:

Cammies: collar.

Service Alfa/Bravo/Charlie and Dress Blues Alfa/Bravo/Charlie/Delta: side of the shoulder. 

Officers:

Cammies: collar.

Service Alfa: on top of the shoulder.

Service Bravo/Charlie: collar. 

Dress Blues Delta/Charlie: collar.

Dress Blues Alfa/Bravo: on top of the shoulder. 

Once you are able to identify if they are officers or enlisted then you have the following options:

Enlisted: no options here, sorry. If to address an enlisted, the proper way is by calling his/her rank or rank and last name. Do not call them “Sir/Ma’am”. Addressing them with the incorrect treatment may lead you to an an answer like: “SIR!  Don't call me sir, I work for a living!”. This is a civilian’s urban legend haha but just in case. For me, that would be very rude of them and I could die in despair if getting that answer but, well…be ready. They don't like it and some (salty old dogs) may even find it insulting. To do a good job, you must definitively call an enlisted by his/her rank, ex.: Corporal Brown.

It is very likely that you will be with someone in the military in this kind of events, so just wait to be introduced and then call them the same way the military person introduces them to you. Unless they are the same rank and friends, they will use protocol. If alone, always ask how to address them.

Officers: these are the easiest, in the way that if you fail to recognize the rank you can address them as “Sir/Ma’am” never “Mr./Mrs.” since this is only used in the Navy. If you want to go one step forward, then use the rank or rank and last name.

When I say “recognize” the rank I mean that you are able to distinguish between a Private from a Corporal, Sergeant, Staff Sergeant, etc. My Marine and I once went to a restaurant and he was wearing his Bravos. There was some kind of event were the police was acting as waiters to collect money for some charity. The officer that got our table mistakenly called my bf: lieutenant; he did not say anything back but I saw how his face disfigured, haha. Poor thing :) so yes, be careful.

There are some tricks that you will learn in your journey as how some ranks can go for shorter names (that I would only use if I’m friends with them) as Master Gunnery Sergeant can be addressed as "Master Guns", Master Sergeant as "Top" and  Gunnery Sergeants as “Gunny”. Marines often insist on the full title, ex.: Second Lieutenant Smith, Master Gunnery Sergeant Jones.


And remember, It is nice if a civilian correctly recognizes a rank when they are in uniform (and branch) but it is uncomfortable when they are wrong. If you are going to go all the way to the ranks, make sure you know them well.

Note: this applies for military events.  Be aware that the protocol varies from Branch to Branch, this specific one applies if you are in the Marine Corps family.

POW/MIA Flag

I was reading about Memorial Day when I came across the POW/MIA flag.  What was this flag? I have never seen it in the States but yet it seemed it had an important meaning.   Here is some information for those who like me want to know a bit more about it. 

What is behind the flag?

POW/MIA stands for Prisoners of War (POWs) and Missing in Action (MIA).  The flag was designed as a symbol of citizen concern about United States military personnel taken as prisoners of war  or listed as missing in action.

It has its origins in 1971 during the Vietnam War with Mary Hoff, member of the National League of Families of American Prisoners and Missing in Southeast Asia. This lady was married to Navy Lt. Cmdr. Michael G. Hoff.  Her husband's plane, an A7A Corsair, was shot down on January 7th 1970 in Southeast Asia. In 1971 she read a Jacksonville Times-Union news story about Annin Flags, a New York flag manufacturer; she contacted the flag company, persuading them to help.  




What Are the Symbols in the Flag?

The flag is black, and bears in the center, in black and white, the emblem of the league.  The emblem features a white disk bearing in black silhouette the bust of a man, a watch tower with a guard on patrol, and a strand of barbed wire; above the disk are the white letters POW and MIA framing a white 5-pointed star; below the disk is a black and white wreath above the white motto: "You are not Forgotten."

How Did the Flag Become Important? 

On 1989 an official League flag that flew over the White House on National POW/MIA Recognition Day 1988 was installed in the U.S. Capitol Rotunda as a result of legislation passed overwhelmingly during the 100th Congress.  On 1990, the 101st Congress passed U.S. Public Law 101-355, recognizing the National League of Families POW/MIA Flag and designating it "as a symbol of our Nation's concern and commitment to resolving as fully as possible the fates of Americans still prisoner, missing and unaccounted for in Southeast Asia, thus ending the uncertainty for their families and the Nation." 

The importance of the League’s POW/MIA flag lies in its continued visibility, a constant reminder of the plight of America’s POW/MIAs.  Other than “Old Glory”, the League’s POW/MIA flag is the only flag ever to fly over the White House, having been displayed in this place of honor on National POW/MIA Recognition Day since 1982.  At present, beyond Southeast Asia, it has been a symbol for POW/MIAs from all U.S. wars.

When Should We Fly This Flag?

Passage by the 105th Congress of Section 1082 of the 1998 Defense Authorization Act required that the League’s POW/MIA flag fly six days each year: Armed Forces Day, Memorial Day, Flag Day, Independence Day, National POW/MIA Recognition Day and Veterans Day.  It must be displayed at the White House, the U.S. Capitol, the Departments of State, Defense and Veterans Affairs, the headquarters of the Selective Service System, major military installations as designated by the Secretary of the Defense, all Federal cemeteries and all offices of the U.S. Postal Service.

How to Display It? 
When displayed from a single flagpole, the it should fly directly below, and be no larger than, the United States flag.  If on separate poles, the U.S. Flag should always be placed to the right of the other flags (the viewer's left). 

Is There Really Any Prisoners of War or Missing in Action Personnel Office from the Vietnam War that Supports to Continue Using This Flag as a National Symbol in the US?

Elizabeth Flock from the US News raised this question: "How did an unofficial flag honoring less than 2,000 Americans become an official national symbol that many Americans now see every day?" Lynn O'Shea Director of Research at the National Alliance of Families for the Return of American's Missing Servicemen answered saying that: The POW/MIA Flag started out as a public awareness symbol representing servicemen captured and missing during the Vietnam War. Today, it represented over 80,000 servicemen unaccounted for from World War II, Korea, Cold War, Vietnam, the Gulf Wars and Afghanistan.   

What are your thoughts? Should this flag continue to be displayed as such a strong symbol? 

While you think on that I'll give you this interesting fact: the bust in the flag is Jeffrey Heisley's, that actually was not a POW or MIA.  His father was working with the flag project when he was struck with hepatitis during a Marine Corps training program. 
His shrunken condition inspired his father to draw him in silhouette for the flag.  

My Two Cents...
I found this picture on the internet, when I saw it I thought that it reflected better what I understood the flag meant: the bust was from someone back home waiting for their loved ones. But as you may know by now the bust has no relation with the families of the missing or prisoners.

It seems I was wrong with a lot of things, first being that this flag has a way more recognition than I thought it had; even though I've never noticed it.  

Should this flag be as important as it is now? If we are still thinking about the Vietnam War no, I think it shouldn't. But today it represents more than that war but all of them; there are families still waiting and we can't forget them neither.  The flag could be a remainder for those who have the means, to keep looking for those who are not yet back home.

Mark Your Agenda: The third Friday of September is the National POW/MIA Recognition Day.